Cancer has the power of Death over me, and I have the power of Life over it.
Finding a way of dealing with something that fundamentally changes your world can take a while. It did for me because I had no support from other METAthrivers. Not having contact with others in a similar situation makes understanding what it happening very difficult. When I was told that my cancer was considered incurable and would eventually kill me I had no idea of a time frame, or how I would be able to live the rest of my life. The medical profession may not want to get you false hope, but they also give you false hopelessness. No encouragement. No impression that I may be able to live with this and still have a life. I had to find that for myself, and eventually I realised that I was giving cancer too much power over my life and it was time to put it in its place.
While there is life, there is hope. While there if life, cancer can’t totally win. It feeds off the power that we give it as the centre of our world but there is a lot of me, and my life, that is not controlled by cancer. It just thinks it does. This is the reason that I don’t understand those with early stage breast cancer who spend so much of their time stressing about the cancer returning or progressing. You are feeding its ego, and that ego is big enough by far, it doesn’t need any encouragement. By ignoring cancer … maybe that should be by relegating cancer to a part of your life and your body you are discouraging it; starving it of the spotlight that it loves when it makes you do its bidding. When it makes you cry, when it takes away the ability to sleep or when it makes you stare into its pitiless soul and holds you spellbound and hypnotised. At first it is next to impossible to avert your eyes but with practice you can become enboldened enough to be able to see it for what it is. Nasty, joyless, mean, humourless, and this is what your life will become if you let it keep its hold over you. Put where it belongs, right next to the other rubbish you don’t want from life. Put it in line and make it wait its turn because today I am too busy getting on with living.